Single Thoughts

I had an anonymous commenter leave her thoughts on my Valentine’s Day post. Actually, she’s anonymous only to you–I knew exactly who it was. πŸ™‚

Let me say, this person is a beautiful, Godly person, a good friend, and happily married. She also left that comment with the mindset of considering me as one of the few singles that does make an effort to include her in things and, in return, she is also one of the few marrieds that makes a reciprocal effort for me. I know all this because I called her and we chatted about the subject. πŸ™‚

However, I did find her comment rather thought-provoking. Although some couples or marrieds know better, I’m sure there are some who just never consider that singles might want to hang out with them. And as I read the anonymous comment, I found myself slightly guilty of the same!

I think they do have better things to do on Valentine’s Day, but I know that there are other times when I haven’t included some of them; times when maybe they might have been interested. The thinking behind that is usually along the lines of feeling guilty about dragging them away from their children or their husbands. It is often a hassle for them to organise a night and I don’t want to cause them bother. Or, given that I would rather stay at home with somebody special than be out with a big group, I think why would they WANT to be out with a big group when they CAN be at home with somebody special. πŸ™‚ Or, it comes from the fact that I have slowly given up on trying to eliminate segregation between the groups that I move between.

Personally, I think that segregation is a curse of the modern church. Yes, I really mean that. My friends have always been from 8 hours old to 80 years old. I have married friends and single friends. I have friends that are couple-only and friends that are families. I have young friends and I have older friends. I hate it that things are almost always segregated. Groups for families. Groups for singles. Groups for young marrieds. Groups for teenagers. Groups for the elderly. And the list goes on. Each group needs people out of the other groups. I don’t want only single friends! Segregation is unnatural. Life, natural life, is just not like that.

Anyway, my anonymous commenter reminded me to not give up. I may not be able to change the bigger picture, but I can make sure that my own life is balanced, natural, and varied. I can remember that some marrieds feel the way I do and make sure I remember to include those people. I can remind my married friends that I do like to be included in their things. And we can all live happily ever after.

Well, we can try. πŸ™‚


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