Have I Survived The Week?

To put it simply, yes.

To use more words and exercise my fingers…

In some ways, I guess it got easier as the week went on. I cried a fair bit from Monday till Wednesday but not much at all yesterday and today. On the other hand, I was the most unsettled at home alone yesterday afternoon and it dragged, in spite of the fact that I was doing things.

I went into town yesterday for the second time alone. This time, I was a lot less apprehensive than last week. I didn’t go to the shops or do anything major but at least I drove myself in and out again successfully. I just went to Ali’s (first time I’ve actually been to her house) and spent a couple hours with her which was good.

My father-in-law came down and mowed my yard yesterday morning. I met him at the door with a hug and a “thank you” only to be told that he’d saved some for me to mow myself! That was ok–he has a ride-on mower. I don’t want to learn how to start it (happens to require jumper leads these days) but it wasn’t hard to drive. Being a lovely, sunny day, it was almost like going for a country drive.

My in-laws came down today and spent most of the day with me centred around apples! We’ve preserved 8 large jars; stewed up a big pot and put 6 trays into the dehydrator to dry. They also helped me get our garage sorted out so that I can put my car in there. Since Steve and I moved in, it had just been a place for things to sit and wait to be dealt with. It was always the intention to have it usable for a car but we ran out of time and I’ve ignored it since. With three of us, it didn’t take a lot of time (there was basic organisation already there) and now it looks great. The only problem was that, upon opening the other to-this-point-unused door, it just about fell off! We’d only been opening one half and didn’t realise the hinge on the other one was broken. Just something else to add to the list of jobs…

Anyway, so along with other things I’ve done like housework, paperwork and moving two wheelbarrows of wood from my woodshed down to the house, I feel like I’ve accomplished something worth speaking of this week. I guess even if I didn’t, at least I’ve managed to spend a week of days at my house without guaranteed daytime company.

It’s been a huge blessing having Jo stay. She’s hijacked my kitchen and I’ve been really spoilt–she is a fantastic cook. It’s been nice to know that, at some point, somebody is coming home at night. If I had a housemate, I think life would be ‘cope-able’. I’m not looking forward to endless weeks of being totally alone. It’s not far away. 😦 It makes a huge difference to have somebody else living in the same house, even if they have their own separate life. Jo leaves before I’m up and comes home whenever she wants (which is usually sometime between 5-6pm) and we both do whatever we want at night. Sometimes we talk; sometimes she reads and I computer or vice versa. Sometimes we’re social; sometimes we’re not. I don’t care–it just cuts the aloneness in half. So that’s what I would like: a housemate. But it has to be somebody I can tolerate living with and not a stranger. Who knows… God knows what I want; maybe I’ll have to start talking to Him.


11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Anonymous
    May 16, 2008 @ 19:26:25

    Kristy,I have been following your story since Ali put up the prayer request for Steve and yourself. I just wanted to let you know that you are still in my prayers and I appreciate your honesty in sharing your life. I pray that God will give you the strength to cope with each day.Love Tam


  2. Karen
    May 16, 2008 @ 19:56:34

    Hi Kristy,Still praying for you and crying with you. I can’t know what you’re going through but I know it must be just awful and I hate for you to have to go through this – if only we lived close enough to be able to visit and help fill in some of your long hours. Love karen


  3. Anonymous
    May 16, 2008 @ 21:24:59

    You sound stronger. Yes, talk to God about what you want. You know the verse…Ye have not because ye ask not. I will be praying that the Lord will send the right person along to be a housemate.Laura πŸ™‚


  4. Danielle
    May 16, 2008 @ 23:13:22

    I’m so glad for your accomplishments of this week!!Yes, do pray about a housemate, dear one; I will, too.


  5. Anonymous
    May 16, 2008 @ 23:17:25

    Hi Kristy, It’s me again, Josephine. Well, I’m like you, I made it through the Memorial Service of my husband. God’s Holy presence consumed the service. At the altar call 10 people gave their hearts to The Lord. I don’t really know why God has allowed you and I to go through what we did, but we can either crawl under a rock, never to tell people about Jesus, or we can allow our “Nightmare” to be used to minister to other people. I know that we are dealing with our lost in different ways, but, sweetie please try to allow yourself to begin to heal and “come back to your first Love.” He’s waiting for you with open arms. Go into his presence and let Jesus begin to really be your comforter. I’m praying for you hon. Josephinehttp://www.homeschoolblogger.com/dixiecajuns


  6. Stitchingmum
    May 17, 2008 @ 00:15:07

    Maybe you will πŸ˜‰ We’re still talking to Him about you too πŸ™‚ xxoo


  7. lauren clark
    May 17, 2008 @ 00:29:23

    I’m so proud of you, Kristy.


  8. izitjo
    May 17, 2008 @ 13:14:53

    KristyIt’s been lovely staying with you and even though I’ve had to work and not been around during the day to keep you company as I’d like to, I’m glad it’s been a little help. You’ve done so well this week, spending time on your own and doing a few new housey things. For all the fear that manifests itself at times, this is a huge achievement. You have grounds for growing confidence that you will continue to get stronger as the days go by, even if there are those little steps back now and then.Thanks for having me stay and allowing me to be myself in your company. I value sharing life with my ‘sisters’ and because of the pleasure it is to me I hope that God provides someone to share the house with you at just the right time. If I should ever be without a home again I’m hoping there will be a spot for me!!! For the time being though, I’ll be your short term house mate any time.Jo xo πŸ™‚


  9. sara
    May 17, 2008 @ 15:24:34

    hi there blossom, great to read about your somewhat sucsessful week. i am so glad you have had jo to help with the lonely nights. keep going, you are doing well!! love, small steps, sara xoxoxxo


  10. Mandy Owens
    May 18, 2008 @ 14:41:13

    a housemate would be lovely! i do hope you find one, or rather one finds you. talking to God will more than likely help that process along… so i would encourage it. πŸ˜‰


  11. Robyn
    May 19, 2008 @ 14:17:18

    Its lovely that you’ve had a friend staying to help cut the loneliness down a little. I’m talking to Him about you, I hope a suitable more longterm arrangement becomes apparent.


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